Some choices do not need a defense, they need an explanation, and the explanation is “I was acting silly.” This bird is not sorry. Surrounded by a thousand staring eyes, it has decided that is a them problem. Accountability is for people who got caught.

• Soft cotton tee, unisex fit, true to size
• Screen-printed in the USA with premium ink
• Machine wash cold, tumble dry low

Wear it as a pre-emptive excuse for whatever you are about to do.